Passion to Passion pattern
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This pattern will actually be constructed by her. All you have to do is to carry her description of a passion for something over to a passion for someone (and not forgetting to self-point while doing that:) and ask her, how would that feel.
By Kevin Kupal, mindlist:
"It works well because you'll be seducing her from her own side of the
fence, using feelings that she already feels about something she's
"passionate" about, as opposed to trying to install feelings from the
outside.
I have field tested this and have come to one general conclusion: it works
only in women who have a "passion" for something... be it
mountainclimbing, biking, helping people etc. It fails with "boring"
women... the types who say "I only stay at home and watch TV".
Here are the steps.
1. Find out if she has any activity she feels "passionate" about. Most
likely, these may be her work, her hobby, extra-curricular activities
(if still in school)... anything she would do even if she did it for
free.
2. Ask her... what's important to you in doing (activity)? What do you
feel when you go (activity)? C'mon, tell me what it feels like when
you're there, actually doing (activity). At this point, I am actually
putting her in an internal rep of actually doing that activity, and
associating her into the states the she feels while doing the activity.
I'm eliciting feelings/criteria. You're basically looking for
nominalized "feelings" such as "satisfaction" , fulfillment, love,
challenge, "rush" etc.
3.Then, feedback these nominalized "feelings" and link these to you. I
was just wondering...well...a funny thought occurred to me...what would
it be like when you just find yourself feeling all those feelings you
have for (activity) for another person (point to self)? Can you imagine
what's it like if those feelings you have for (activity), you also feel
for, let's say, your boyfriend (point to self) ?
Example
Me: I was just wondering, what do you really love doing? Name something
that you would do that you find so engrossing that you'd do it, even if
you were never paid to do it?
Her: Well... when I get some stacked up vacation leaves, I go mountain
climbing with the local mountain climbing association.
Me : Oh...you like mountain climbing. I'm curious...what is it about
mountain climbing that makes you love it? What do you feel when you're
mountain climbing? What's it like when you're there now, mountain
climbing?
Her: Well...uphill its very hard and steep...but once you get to the
summit, you can feel the wind on your face...all that
exhiliration...freedom...sense of accomplishment and just this feeling
of fulfillment...those make the hike worth every step...
Me: (giggle a little)...A funny thought just came over me. I'm just
wondering, what would it be like if you could feel all those feelings in
another human being? I mean, what if you could just IMAGINE, having a
boyfriend (point to self, subtly) who also makes you FEEL ALL THAT
EXHILIRATION...that FREEDOM that sense of ACCOMPLISHMENT and deep
FULFILLMENT. When YOU'VE FOUND THAT GUY, when the time comes that YOU'RE
LOOKING AT HIM...feeling all those feelings...NOW what would it be like?
Her : Gee...I'd do him just as much as I do mountain climbing...and with
equal passion...oh...I didn't mean it like I said it! (hahaha...Freudian slip!)
(yada yada)"
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