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MrSex4uNYC comments on David Shade's  "The Kiss"




From mrsex4unyc@aol.comedr4d Thu Nov 25 01:54:05 1999
From: mrsex4unyc@aol.comedr4d (MrSex4uNYC)
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Subject: Re: field report David Shade "the kiss" (part 1 of 2)
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>Subject: field report David Shade "the kiss"
>From: David Shade davidshade@home.com 
>Date: Mon, 22 November 1999 08:52 AM EST
>Message-id: <38394A74.258C15C9@home.com>

BRAVOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
BRAVOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
BRAVOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  :)

DUDE!  your skills have increased INCREDIBLY!  this was a FUCKING CLINIC!

sweeeeet!  :)

>After checking out a number of places, I eventually make my way to this
>one large crowded loud night club.  By now it is about 12:30 AM.  My
>attention is grabbed by a blonde and a brunette standing at the bar.
>
>I approach the brunette and say "Excuse me, I know you are having a beer
>with your friend, but can I ask you something?"  She looks at me but
>says nothing.  I say "Do you know the best place to go?  I have not
>partied in this town for some time."

hahaha sweet.  you start the conversation with her and you don't WANT anything
from her that she isn't willing to give you (yet) like a blowjob.  you also get
her to DO SOMETHING FOR YOU making her feel like you are a worthy person to do
things for (watch that cognitive dissonance now!)

>She stares coldly for a moment and
>then says "Here."  I say "Thank you.  I used to come here when it was
>called ___."  She says "Oh. Do you remember when ___ used to play
>here?"  I say "No, but do you remember when ___ used to play here?"

good sign.  she could have instructed you to ANOTHER PLACE far away from her :)

>Then the blonde motions to the brunette as if to ask what is going on.
>The brunette tells the blonde "He is asking where the best place to go
>is."  I say to the blonde "Yes, I used to live here some time ago and I
>was wondering what is the best place to go."  She says "Where do you
>live now?"

HELLO!  BINGO!  notice the MARKED difference in the reaction to the same
statement "I used to live here"  one chick talks about the PAST and this chick
talks about the PRESENT... HIS present.  she is not interested in trivia games
like the other chick.  she is interested in David as a person :)

>I say "The Detroit area."  She says "Oh, what do you do
>there?"  I say "I am an engineer, but I am only analytical during the
>day."  She laughs heartily at this one.  I continue with "After work I
>relax and enjoy being a human, and being creative."

ha!  cover all the bases

>She says "What is
>your name?"  I extend my hand and say "My name's David."  She shakes my
>hand and says "My name's Suzanne."

PERFECT!  no names until they ASK for your name and don't ask for hers either. 
hehehe

>Suzanne then asks me "So, do you paint?"  I say "No, I write poetry."

oh god no... here we goooo :)  PLEASE, PLEASE don't let this guy start reciting
poetry ladies :)  there ought to be a composite in the Post Office of David
with a piece of paper :/

>She says "Really?"  I say "Yes, and if I were to recite one of my poems
>to you, would you give me your honest opinion?"

Nice softener and presupposition

>She motions to her
>friend and says "He is going to tell us a poem."  I want to direct my
>poem only to Suzanne.  I look at Suzanne as I start Nick Fortune's "Two
>Eyes."  She finds that she has to put her ear near my mouth to hear.

yeah.  speak softly intentionally so you pull her in

>she did not really feel that she was the most "special person"
>to him.  She said it did not make her feel "beautiful" or "sexy."  I
>look her directly in the eyes and move my face slightly closer to hers
>and say "You want to be with (sp) a man who makes YOU FEEL BEAUTIFUL and
>makes YOU FEEL SEXY and makes YOU FEEL LIKE THE MOST SPECIAL PERSON."
>She says "Oh yes.  I don't know why I am telling you all this."  She
>does not wait for a response, but instead continues talking.

this is the funiest shit hahahaha you basically DICTATED all of this shit to
her and she went for it :)

>The brunette never interrupted us and Suzanne had totally forgotten
>about her.  The brunette goes around to behind Suzanne and introduces
>herself to some guy standing there, and then she checks to see if I am
>seeing this.

ha!  too late honey... you FUCKED IT UP!  yo... you never said which one was
the target.  were they BOTH viable targets?  did you approach the brunette ON
PURPOSE because she was the lesser of the two?  I know WHY you picked the
blonde, but other than that enthusiasm and desire to get to know you, was the
brunette an obstacle when you walked up or an alternative target?

>Suzanne and I have established good rapport, so I go into the IC
>pattern.  She says "Oh no!  That has never happened to me!"  I say "That
>has never happened to you?"  She says "I am too protective."  I say
>"What do you mean?" She says "I put up a wall to protect my
>vulnerability.  I have been hurt too many times."

this APPEARS to be a double problem.  she has never felt the IC (or so she
says) so you can't anchor that. she has also declared that she is damaged
goods.  I see how later you use the vulnerability to good advantage though.

>Then she looks me directly in the eyes and moves her face a little
>closer and says "I could tell you were an older man." I say "Thank you.
>How could you tell I am a more mature man?"  She says "Because you look
>at me right in the eyes.  Young men cannot look at me right in the
>eyes."  I move closer to her face and look intensely into her eyes and
>say "I think the eyes are the windows to the spirit."  She says "Oh, so
>true, the spirit is what we truly are.  Our bodies are just the gift
>that God gave us.  A tool."

very nice. very nice.  chicks are always looking for a guy NOT to want them for
their bodies or for RAW, ANIMAL SEX!  they believe in some spiritual connection
that is a WORTHY reason for sex.  this ENTIRE SECTION is GOLD!  :)

>In my deepest, most sensual voice, I say "Yes, so true.  In order to
>really get to know (sp) someone, you must look deep into their spirit.
>Only when YOU TRULY KNOW THIS PERSON (sp) can you use this tool of
>expression, and SHARE THE GIFT OF OUR BODIES so deeply (motion back and
>forth.)  When YOU REALLY KNOW THIS PERSON (sp) YOU FEEL FREE to
>CELEBRATE THIS GIFT that brings our spirits so much closer together."

tremendous.  using her bodies=gift... nice all around.

>She slowly moves the tip of her nose to almost touch the tip of my
>nose.  She lets her breasts touch my chest.  I softly hold her hand
>which is hanging at her side.  We stare into each other's eyes for a
>moment.  I then look at her lips and go into the first kiss pattern.  I
>do it very slowly and sensually.  I lick my lips but she does not lick
>hers.  I tilt my head slightly to one, but she does not move any closer.

this is interesting.  this is where I would have HAD to kiss her... but I
understand what you are doing and I think you are absolutely right in this
instance.  once I see the green light, I throw that shit into GEAR!  I know you
are baiting her and structuring ops, but I would have switched up here... just
a little though :)

>Then, she drops her head back exposing her neck.  I would love to kiss
>her neck but she did not kiss my lips.  So I simply describe very softly
>into her ear how it would feel for her to have her neck kissed.  She
>then puts the side of her face just next to the side of mine.

can you say a couple of words about this?  is it that kissing her neck is a
REWARD for her kissing you on the lips?  is kissing you on the lips some SIGN
that she wants to be with you?  is it just that SHE needs to initiate because
you are the seller and she is the buyer?  I personally ALWAYS go neck or ear
first.  then again, MY focus is to make her PHYSICALLY feel like she wants
more.  you have chosen to talk her down.

what do you think it meant when she put her face next to yours?  is her kissing
you on the lips the ONLY sign you will accept of her interest in you giving you
the green light to do more?  I am very interested in the logic or technique
behind this because I would have been all over her already.  if there is a
better logic here, I would like to consider it :)

>I say "If we keep doing this, we are going to GET SO INCREDIBELY HOT.
>But we can't do that."  I respectfully back away and say "As much as I
>want to take you home with me tonight, I can't.  I am staying at my
>parents house with my two sons."

I understand saying you can't take her home... structuring the op for her to
take you somewhere else.  it seems premature though.  why are you talking about
this already?  why are you talking about taking her home?  why are you
considering changing venues and potentially breaking her state?

why use NEGATIVES like "but we can't do that"?  I understand it's a setup for
the next line about taking her home.  I think you were premature moving it to
this stage.  then again... you are the romantic and I am not.  you might not
consider fucking her in the bar bathroom or getting head from her out in your
car.

>She says "Oh, I have a son too.  How
>old are yours?"  It turns out she had been married from age 18 to 21 and
>she has a young son whom she and her ex husband have joint custody of.
>This is her week off.  We talk about raising children and shared
>values.  She has her undergraduate and masters degree in Human
>Resources.

NOW look what happened to you :)  because of your POWER PLAY to get her to take
you home INSTEAD of getting her physically horny enough to grab your hand and
PULL YOU out of the place so SHE can get some dick... you are now having
another discussion and have fallen WAY off the path.  I know you pull it back
later :) but you had her in a PRIME position BEFORE you came up with "we can't
do that".  what was your reasoning as to WHY you can't do that?  was that a
test to get her to say "I WANT to do that?"  I really don't get it.  please
enlighten me.  at this point, going with the A instead of the K seems to have
FUMBLED!

>Then she says "You are a good listener."  I say "Thank you.  How do you
>mean?"  She says "Most people just say 'yeah, ahum, yeah' but you really
>listen to what I say."  I reply with "There is a big difference between
>just hearing someone (point away) and really listening to someone (sp).
>When YOU REALLY LISTEN TO THIS PERSON (sp) you feel that YOU REALLY KNOW
>THIS PERSON and it allows you to FEEL FREE WITH THIS PERSON to allow
>yourself to BECOME VULNERABLE TO THIS PERSON."  She enthusiastically
>agrees.

nice vulnerability reference

>our bodies are our bodies.  They are what God gave us.  I once wanted to
>be a model, but I will not eat just two cucumber slices a day. This is
>my body.  Also, a person has to accept me for what I am."
>
>I say "Yes, your man (sp) is a man who accepts you for what you are.  A
>man who makes YOU FEEL like the special woman that you are.  A man who
>makes YOU FEEL SO BEAUTIFUL.  A man who makes YOU FEEL SO VERY SEXY."

nice

>She says "I am not seeing anyone right now.  Are you seeing anyone right
>now?"

EXCELLENT sign.  it is always good when she asks you about your status.

>I say "No."  She says "What does David want in a woman?"  I say
>"David wants..."  She laughs and interrupts me with "No, let's not talk in
>the third person."  We share a laugh and I start over with "I want to be
>with a woman... (I lightly touch the upper part of her sternum) who has...
>(I recite Ross' "special qualities" pattern and motion back and forth.)

I can't tell if the following is in RESPONSE to your pattern or INTERRUPTING
your pattern.  I assumed she heard some song called Lolita?

>She says "Lolita."  I say "What?"  She says "lo-LEE-ta!" and she swings
>her hips and flings one arm in the air.  I say "Lolita?"  She says "Have
>you ever seen that movie?"  I say "What was that movie about?"  She says
>"It was about a woman named Lolita.  Sometimes I am Lolita.  I am a very
>proper woman, but sometimes I am Lolita.  A slut."

uh-oh...  gentlemen... START YOUR ENGINES!  I would have STEAMROLLED HER for a
remark like that!  :)  I probably would have started with "you? :)  come on! 
ha.  please.  how good a slut would YOU be?" and challenged her to REALLY get
into character.  PUT-UP or SHUT-UP!

>I say "You like to
>allow that woman inside you to come out."  She corrects me and says
>"That little girl" as she puts her hand to show the height of the girl.
>I correct my statement with "You like to allow that little girl inside
>you to come out."  She says "Oh yes.  Most men cannot deal with the fact
>that I am a very sensual woman, that at times I want to be a slut.
>There is nothing wrong with it, but they just cannot deal with it."

oh she would have caught it for this shit :)

>I know that this woman wants a strong man.  I motion away and say "Some
>men are not strong enough to deal with a very sensual woman, but (sp)
>your strong man can bring out the slut in you."  She says "Are you a
>strong man?"  I reply by challenging her: "Are you the type of woman who
>can ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL FREE with this man (sp).  Can you (touch her
>sternum) give permission to your strong man to be gentle yet strong with
>you?"  She says "Can you deal with a woman who wants to be a slut?"  I
>say "Nothing gives me greater pleasure than to take this proper woman
>(touch her sternum) and melt down her walls and make YOU FEEL SO OPEN
>(slide finger slowly down her sternum) and make YOU FEEL SO VULNERABLE
>and make YOU FEEL SO SEXY."   She has the doggy dinner bowl look big
>time, so I slide my finger down into her cleavage and say "and make YOU
>FEEL SO HOT."
>
>She looks at my hand that is pointing at her cleavage and she takes my
>hand and slides it down over her breast.  She watches as I softly hold
>her breast while her hand still softly covers my hand.  She presses her
>breast against my hand.  I feel her nipple erection through her thin
>lacy bra.  She drops her head back and allows her body to fall against
>mine.  He ear is next to my mouth.  I say very sensually into her ear
>"And make YOU FEEL SO VERY EXCITED....and make YOU FEEL SO VERY
>SENSUAL....and make YOU FEEL SO VERY SEXY....and make YOU FEEL SO VERY
>HOT."  She puts her free hand behind my head and slowly slides the side
>of her face back against mine until our lips are very close.  She allows
>the tip of her tongue to slide out between her lips just so slightly.
>Then she gently bites her bottom lip.  She looks at my lips and then she
>slowly tilts her head to one side and closes her eyes and very slowly
>brings her lips to mine and softly kisses me.

nice

>I do not move into her or tilt my head.

moving on girls is subtle but important.  I leaned in to kiss this pivot I was
hanging out with the other day and she DELIBERATELY moved around to kiss me on
the cheek.  HAHAHA I felt like a fucking idiot!  so the rest of the time we
spent together, I gave her NO LOVE!  she tried to grab my arm french-promenade
style and I never bent it HAHAHA her hand was sliding down my jacket... she
looked SOOO STUPID like princess leia hanging on to luke or something hahaha :)
 when I was leaving her I didn't move on her AT ALL and then she came to me and
gave me a long hug... so I felt her ass up and left :)

I ALWAYS move on chicks because my plan is to intimidate them into action or
ejecting ASAP.  a chick won't last A DAY with me without getting pressured in
some fashion.  with this style though, you are DETERMINED to talk her down and
create the DESIRE in her to go after YOU, making you the seller and not the
buyer.  I think the style of making her take sex from you is interesting... not
a style that I would use, but it is very effective sometimes.  when I tell
chicks I don't find them attractive, they suddenly want to tell me how hot they
look dressed up and flirt with me and get me back on the bandwagon-to-NOWHERE!
:)

>I allow her to lead for a while.  Then she opens her lips
>ever so slightly and begins kissing me passionately.  Now I partake and
>I kiss her back passionately.  She removes her hand from my hand and
>puts it behind my head.  I put my free hand on the back of her waist.
>
>Right there, at the bar, in this crowded night club, we are kissing
>passionately with her hands on the back of my head while I firmly fondle
>her breast.  Only one hour after first meeting this completely sober
>proper educated professional woman.
>
>Then she drops her head back again exposing her neck and wraps her arms
>around my neck to place her neck very closely to me.  I kiss her neck.
>Then I make my way up to her ear and I sensually yet strongly say into
>her ear "You FEEL SO VERY SPECIAL....You FEEL SO VERY BEAUTIFUL....You FEEL
>SO VERY SENSUAL....You FEEL SO VERY SEXY....You FEEL SO VERY EXCITED....You
>FEEL SO VERY HOT....You are so HOT you cannot stand it....You are so TURNED
>ON that you must have this....You FEEL LIKE THE SLUT THAT YOU ARE."  She
>holds on tighter.  I really go for it now and say "You have to have this
>so fcking badly.  You need this so fcking badly.  You want to be fcked
>like the slut that you are."  She starts moaning.  She lifts one leg and
>rubs the inside of her thigh against the outside of my thigh.  I hold
>her breast even more firmly and say "You want to be fcked so fcking hard
>like the slut that you are."  She moans even more.

right here... you are WAY in there!  I mean extract this chick to a dark area,
bathroom or car with tinted windows and you're SET!

>I have got to get this woman to take me home, and I have to do it before
>she realizes what she is doing in this crowded night club.

I TOTALLY DISAGREE!  don't discount the effects of what you are doing to her. 
yes you need to get her out of the crowd... but HOME is NOT where you want her.
 there are too many things for her to consider that are going to break her
state.  make out with her.  extract her somewhere and feel her up and make her
BEG to have you inside her.  I hear that shit all the time "I want you inside
me"  THAT'S what counts... NOT being in her house in a bed... the fact that she
CRAVES PENETRATION!

you are also making erroneous assumptions.  you are ASSUMING that she would not
do this in front of people.  she TOLD YOU that she LIKES being a slut.  maybe
sex in public is part of her slut-persona.  maybe NOT wanting to have sex in
public but being FORCED TO by a strong man is part of it.  maybe not wanting to
have sex in public but not being able to help herself BECAUSE she is truly a
slut is what turns her on.  you are assuming she will take you home at all. 
what if someone is at her house like a husband or a boyfriend or her mother is
visiting?  what if her neighbors are nosey and she can't AFFORD to have any
random guys come to her house or they will snitch?  what if she lives in a
FUCKING TRAILER and is ashamed to take you there?  you are assuming she would
RATHER be fucked at home than in a bar bathroom... like... a... SLUT!  pay
attention to the real-life ramifications of what she says to you WHILE you
listen for the SS uses.  you elicited her fantasy, but didn't USE it.  that
shit about a strong man was really great.

right here... you should have started role-playing.

she has MADE HERSELF the slut.  she has made you HER MASTER!  be that man.  be
her master.  take her.  do it.  perhaps it is easier said than done.  I happen
to be a chameleon.  I can change into whatever character is necessary to
complete her fantasy.  I was cyber-sexing this chick the other day, and I
realized that she was into a little ROUGHER treatment than I would use on a
normal chick.  I IMMEDIATELY changed my style from descriptions of my regular
kino to descriptions of a MASTER controlling HIS SLUT!
I had fun and she TOTALLY got off on it.  I COULD have ignored what REALLY made
her feel HOT and HORNY, but I wanted her to have the most INTENSE orgasm she
could have and reflecting HER FANTASY to her was the key.  you should have
ASSUMED THE PERSONA of a TRUE MASTER and dragged your slut off somewhere and
shoved your dick in her mouth... but then again, I know you are the romantic
and this may have been an emotional STRETCH for you... but I guarantee you it
would have been worth it. :)

you even SAID that she wasn't drunk.  she knows EXACTLY what she's doing in a
crowded nightclub.  she GAVE her body to you to use as you pleased.  you should
have gotten into character and USED HER!

>I go for the
>close.  I say "We are making each other so fcking hot.  We need to be
>with each other tonight.  This is cruel.  I can't take you home with
>me.  We can't think about how incredible it would be."
>
>She stands still, lowers her leg, and brings forward her head to look at
>me, and she agrees.  She does not offer to take me home with her.
>
>She says "But I can give you my number and you can give me yours and you
>can call me!"  We compose ourselves and turn towards the bar.

OH GOD!

now this is the SECOND time she broke state.  and you know what you did BOTH
TIMES?  you pressed for the "take me home" shit and never switched gears to
kino and action.  perhaps she was NEVER going to fuck you that night at all,
but I think she was ready for some action.  YOU are the man at this shit and
YES I read all the way to the end where you get her for the good relationship
on your terms and all that... but this is where I say get off of autopilot. 
talking her into bed is one thing, but talking her into being horny, THEN doing
what has made populations exist for THOUSANDS OF YEARS is another.  I say talk
her into the mood, the FUCK HER OUT OF THE MOOD!  I say you had her and she
came out of state because you were talking when you should have been kissing
and feeling.

was there a particular reason that you WANTED to go HOME with this chick?  I
don't get it.

>She asks
>her friend for a piece of paper and a pen.  The brunette is no longer
>talking to anyone.  Suzanne and I exchange numbers.  She includes her
>last name.  She then wants to exchange email addresses, so we do that.
>Then she goes to the bathroom.  It is last call.  The brunette comes
>over to me and starts conversation.  When Suzanne returns she says to me
>"My friend is staying at my place tonight.  Walk us to my car."

ok.  now there you have a reason.  she could NOT go home with you because she
had to take her friend to her house.  there was NO WAY she was leaving without
that girl.  when YOU KEPT TELLING HER let's go home, she was breaking state
because home was reminding her of the brunette and of her son and of her
ex-husband and of REAL LIFE!  stop it stop it stop it.  once you get them in
the fantasy, KEEP THEM FANTASIZING!  you created GREAT states for her and she
was loving it... you have to capitalize on these gains ASAP and move into the K
realm and get yours!

>I walk her to her car with her friend in tow.  Suzanne and I embrace and
>kiss one last time.  I say "It is too bad that tonight cannot continue
>for hours more.  We cannot think about how incredible it would be."  She
>says "My friend is staying at my place tonight.  Call me.  I can drive
>to Detroit."

there you go again.  more negative remarks.  I see what you were trying to do,
but she was NOT suggestible by this point.  you are talking about doing things
tonight and her response is about her girlfriend... she is not connected now. 
DRIVE TO DETROIT?  what kind of response is that for a woman that is in your
face NOW?  I guarantee you that a woman that is willing to DRIVE TO DETROIT to
be alone with you would have SUBMITTED to you when you had her in state and
followed you WHEREVER to get fucked (like the bathroom of the bar)

>wait about 2 weeks and send her an email saying "If we never get the
>chance to enjoy each other's company again, I just wanted to thank you
>for giving me the most incredible, unforgettable, kiss I have ever
>received."

I like this :)  referencing the kiss and acting like it meant something to you.
 that it was different from other kisses you received from other women.  there
was some spiritual connection that you made with her that you had not felt
befor or since... you can go a long way with what YOU felt from a kiss...
interesting :)

>I will not be a one night 'nightclub' flirtatious
>fantasy.  That happens all too often.  I am interested in a mutually
>fulfilling relationship based on mutual trust and respect.  I will not
>settle for anything less.  There are many honest and genuine women who
>want that too."

this is a good stance.  I am in popular demand.  don't bullshit me.  don't
waste my time.  don't lie to me and cheat DESERVING women out of spending time
with me that you are hogging up.  the "mutually fulfilling" part is good too
because it shows that you are not ONLY interested in your pleasure (and in this
case, spiritual nourishment) but hers is EQUALLY important.

>I reply using some of her trance words: "I am still interested in
>talking.  I understand becoming attached to children. I know that you
>are a very up beat person, as well as a strong independent woman.  You
>are also a very beautiful and special woman.  Hopefully soon you will
>feel comfortable with the idea of seeing me again.  When you honestly
>can say to yourself that, you are ready to again enjoy the company that
>we enjoyed together, and, you feel that you want to get together, then
>give me a call."  (Notice the placement of commas in that last
>sentence.)

oh shit :)  until I read the parens, I passed right over it.  I knew they were
in the wrong places, but everybody does typos :)  sweet.  more dictation.  I
have to add more FEEL statements into my speech patterns.

>The following night, Friday, she calls me.

ha!

>am very happy, but there is just one thing missing.  Sometimes,
>especially at this time of night, I miss having someone, someone to
>hold, someone special to cherish."  She asks "Are you lonely?"  I say
>"At times I am lonely.  Sometimes at this time of night."

sweet.  since I am never lonely, I never considered playing the "hold me...
PLEASE!" angle.  this is a PERFECT way to structure ANY op to get with a chick.
 I always call them because I want something from them or I want to go
somewhere and I request their company.  I never call them out of NEED for
myself.  I never structure the op for them to help ME!  I never give them a
chance to be someone special for me.  I will try this out.  HAHAHAHA I love
this!  then it's the good old cascade.  she comforted me, so now she has an
emotional investment in me.  I seem emotional AND I can use that to RECIPROCATE
and REWARD her for being there for me, which gives her even MORE incentive to
be there for me.  meanwhile she is building equity in my eyes (as far as she's
concerned) I feel differently about her because she serves a different purpose
to me than T&A.  I have a spiritual connection to her and she can bring another
element into my life that other women can't.  when I request to see her, it
will be for her "spirit" and not her body... then I can go into that stuff you
used before about when I feel this spiritual connection, I want to give you the
gift of my body blah blah blah... veeeeery interesting :)

>She says "And
>what is it that you seek when you feel lonely?"  I say "I want to feel a
>deep incredible connection - on all levels of intimacy - emotional,
>intellectual, physical, and spiritual."

nice

>She says "Everything in my relationship was fine, except there was no
>passion.  Without passion sex is just mechanical.  I need the passion.
>It is something that is either there or is not.  You just know it when
>it is there.  It is in the look."  I say "Sex without passion is just
>mechanical.  When there is passion, you know it when you look into this
>person's eyes.  Like that night we met, when we looked deeply into each
>other's eyes, we both knew."  She says "It is the passion I miss.  I did
>not realize it until that night we met.  Ever since that night I have
>realized how much I need it."

that, gentlemen is what it's ALL about.  give them something that they WANT and
are not getting on a regular basis.  they will SEEK YOU OUT to get more of it.

>I say "Then you are probably wondering if there is a way where you can
>experience passion again without getting into a deep relationship,
>without involving children, without compromising your self esteem, where
>you can FEEL HAPPY ABOUT YOURSELF."

that was a really good line :)  I missed the relevance to kids the first time I
read this.  I thought you were DICTATING to her not to want a deep
relationship, but you were referencing the relationship with the guy that she
doesn't like any more but is attached to his kids.  that was a multiple-win
setup.  nice.

>She says "Are you asking me or are
>you telling me?"  I say "I am saying that is probably what you have been
>considering."  She says "Would you like to get together?"  I say "I
>would like that, but only under the condition that there will be no
>involvement of children, that there will not be a heavy relationship,
>that you feel that YOU HAVE A HIGH SELF ESTEEM, that you feel that YOU
>ARE TRULY HAPPY, and that we can take the time to get to know that WE
>FEEL THE PASSION BETWEEN US."

excellent.  I have learned from that section :)  I still would NEVER have
gotten here because I would have fucked around with her in the bar without any
conversation of ANYTHING and then SHE would have been playing catch-up if there
were things she WANTED other than fun and sex from our "relationship".  since
you have gotten to this point though, it is a really great idea to DEFINE the
boundaries in the beginning so that she knows and agrees what she's getting
into.




From mrsex4unyc@aol.comedr4d Thu Nov 25 01:58:24 1999
From: mrsex4unyc@aol.comedr4d (MrSex4uNYC)
Newsgroups: alt.seduction.fast
Subject: Re: field report David Shade "the kiss" (part 2 of 2)
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>She says "OK."  I say "OK."  She says "I will drive to you and we can go
>out for a drink."  I say "That would be great."  She says "When would be
>good for you?"  I say "When is good for you?"  She says "How about
>Sunday night?"  I say "I have my sons until Sunday night."  She says
>"How about Monday night?"  I say "That would be good."  She says "I will
>be done working out by 7.  I can be there by 9.  How do I get there?"  I
>say "I will email you detailed directions and a map."  She agrees and we
>say good night.

I do the same thing.  make THEM make all the plans.  SHE wants to see ME.  I am
doing her the favor of hanging out with her and showing her a good time.  SHE
needs to make it happen.

>We did not discuss a location to meet - whether it be a bar or my
>place.  The next day I email her directions to my place.  In the email I
>say "When you get here, we will go to a nearby place to have a drink.  I
>look forward to our conversation."

good... you might bag her BEFORE going ANYWHERE.  "having a drink" was CLEARLY
an excuse for her to come and see you.

>I spend some time during the weekend preparing a story that I will tell
>Suzanne.  It is based on Bishop's "Necklace" pattern, but tailored
>specifically to Suzanne and using Suzanne's trance words.  I know that
>my story is corny as hell, and obviously contrived, but I have come to
>realize that Ross is right that women each this shit up.

I will have to start collecting trance words.  I don't use them to the effect
that you did throughout this CLINIC!  I use them to find out what is missing in
her life, then I throw them away.  I have never used this hardcore
dictation-style.  storytelling fits right in with this because you were telling
her a story the whole time.

>Monday night at 9:00 I print off the story and put it in my jacket.
>When Suzanne arrives, she calls her friend (the brunette) to tell her
>she arrived OK.  Then we get into my car for the drive to the local
>pub.  Suzanne is very talkative and there is no problem maintaining
>small talk.  She mentions that she has told her people at work that she
>will not be in until noon the next day.

CHA-CHING!

>The pub is crowded.  We find a table against the wall.  Due to the noise
>level, we have to sit next to each other on the bench seat to hear each
>other.  The waitress comes by and we order a drink.
>
>I do not want any more small talk and I want to get Suzanne into a
>trance right away, so just as soon as we are settled in and feeling
>comfortable, I bring out the story.  I say "I have written a story to
>tell you."  She says "Oh really?  Oh my.  I would love to hear it!"  I
>begin reading the story.
>
>By the end of the story, Suzanne is a bright pink and has a big smile on
>her face.  She looks at me and says "WHO was that about?"  I just
>smile.  She says "Was that about us?"  I say "It could be."

nice

>She says "You know, I used to know this guy.  He was drop dead
>gorgeous.  But he did not interest me.  We would play tennis together
>and he would sweat and he would take off his shirt.  He was tall and
>broad. I know he wanted to sleep with me.  But as beautiful as he was,
>he did not interest me, because he had nothing interesting to say.  But
>you, everything you say, is so fascinating, so warm and fuzzy.  You make
>me feel warm and fuzzy."

that's why TYPE doesn't matter.  he was PHYSICALLY her type and could have
fucked her whenever he wanted, but he only made her feel LUST which was not
enough for this chick.  she needed PASSION.  she didn't have it for him and he
didn't have it for her.  you created... DICTATED passion to her, and she felt
it and loved it.  she FELT passionate about you and felt that you felt it too
for her.

>I say "Nothing gives me greater pleasure than
>making YOU FEEL SO GOOD."  She says "He used to call me at 5:30 in the
>morning and want to go play tennis.  I hated that.  You don't get up
>early do you, you go in at about 9, right?"  I say yes.

damn... you got really good at those FEEL statements.

>She says "What time do you get up on the weekends?"  I say "About
>noon."  She laughs and says "Well I don't get up that late, but I do
>like to take my time about things."  I say "I like to get up and take my
>time about making pancakes.  In fact, some Saturday morning I would like
>to make you some pancakes, and I would take my time about dripping maple
>syrup on you and then slowly licking it all off."

HA!  ok now... WHERE did that come from? that is a blatantly sexual reference. 
what CUE did you get to change to this type of talk?

>She says "Why me?  I mean, why me?  Of all the woman you could have
>selected that night, why did you choose me?"

this is IT friends... the LAST question.  if he passes this one, it's his :) 
she is ready to go.  she just wants affirmation that she is doing the right
thing.

>I say "After having gone
>to the night clubs for so many years, I have cum to realize that beauty
>is common.

nice

>I could go into any night club and I could begin
>conversation with any number of beautiful women, but it takes more than
>beauty to interest me."  I recite Ross' "special qualities" pattern.  I
>continue with "Soon after you and I began talking, I began to feel that
>you might posses those qualities.  And you know how I knew that?"  She
>says "How?"  I say "Because I felt that incredible connection between
>us.  I felt it right here."  I point to my solar plexus.  She says "Yes,
>right here."  And she points to her solar plexus.  She says "It is like
>the sun.  It is warm and fuzzy."

hahahahaha

>Then she moves her face very close to mine and says "You know, I was a
>bad girl."  I say "Is that so?  How is that?"  She says "After our phone
>conversation the other night, you made me cum."

what conversation is she talking about?  the one where you told her you wanted
to get together with her?  or was there another one?

>I say "I am so happy to
>hear that.  How did I make you cum?"  She just smiles.  I say "Was I
>touching you?"  She says "No.  You were licking me and then making love
>to me.  I love it like that, going from one right into the other."

see that.  now let's backtrack to the bar when you had her in your arms.  if
you had licked her neck INSTEAD of TALKING about going home with her, you would
have gotten a reaction.  SHE would have requested sex because of how hot she
felt from you LICKING HER!  talking about going home did NOTHING for her. 
besides, you were premature because "going home" with you didn't mean anything
to her yet.  you gave her no PHYSICAL reason to believe you could make her cum,
AND you didn't elicit what she likes in sex until NOW!  she had NO incentive to
take you home at all.  she DID have incentive to give you your shot to prove
your FOREPLAY skills.  chicks will lay a guy with EXCELLENT foreplay.  if you
can make her feel like that without fucking her, IMAGINE when you get to the
REAL SHIT!  that's why you need to TALK... until it's time NOT to talk.

>Then she proceeds slowly to give me another incredible, unforgettable
>kiss.  It gets deeper and hotter.  I pull back and look around and then
>look at her and say "Everybody is probably saying 'Those two should get
>a room'."  She laughs and says "Yes."  I say "Hey, we SHOULD get a
>room."  She says "Yes, we SHOULD get a room."  I say "OK."  She says
>"OK."  And then she jumps up and grabs her coat so I jump up and grab my
>coat.  I take her hand and we walk quickly to my car.  We drive back to
>my place where we spend hours doing delightfully lurid things to each
>other.
>
>David Shade

excellent ending and overall excellent post.

you do realize however that you could have BYPASSED the "get a drink" idea. 
don't take chicks LITERALLY.  she drove all that way to get FUCKED!  not to
have an alcoholic beverage.  when she came to your house, you should have A)
offered her a drink to get started "before you go to the bar".  she would have
agreed.  then, before she finishes her drink...

"I have written a story to tell you."  She says "Oh really?  Oh my.  I would
love to hear it!"
I begin reading the story.....